Jokes and Riddles

Haha, if my girl came home with a card in her ass, I'd dump her...

I'd think she was dirty

LMAO

card up her ass that was funny!!!!

Disimula, y la mula dijo si.

Habia un hombre tan, pero TAN rico que se lo comieron.

that's a good one...at first i was like hmmmm then i got it



>>> CACKK <<<, pronounce it letter by letter in spanish...

Haha good one, El D.F. dude likes these "burradas" as he calls them.

HILARIOUS!!!!!!! Luved it!!!!!

LOL! I know, I cracked up when I heard it. It's cute.

Un dia habia un muchacho que estaba sentado en frente de su casa fumando marijuana. Prende el cigarro y empieza a fumar. Mira un avion pasar y dice "Que bonito avion." Fuma mas y mira otro avion y dice "Que bonito avion." Fuma una vez mas y mira otro avion...luego mira el avion bajar y chocar. Apaga su cigarro y camina hacia alla. Mira partes donde quiera...cabezas aqui, manos por alla, patas por aca, y luego mira una oreja...la levanta y dice "ey, estan bien?"

I dont get it...but G says its funny...supposably.

There was this one guy, he was a Mexican guy. He came over one time and got caught comitting a crime and got locked up. There was a big black dude there as his cell mate and he said "Im gonna Fuck you tonight". The Mexican dude not knowin any English responded "Mande?" And the black dude says "Im gonna Fuck you tonight" The Mexican dude once again said "Mande?" The black dude finally gave up and said "No, bitch...not Monday, tonight."

You need a pretty weird sense of humour to get these


Why couldnt the cat drink its milk?
Its tongue was stapled to the floor.

Why did the man fall off his bike?
Someone threw a fridge at him.

Why did the the girl fall off the swing?
She had no arms

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
Because it was dead


And just coz i was bored

15 P in a R T - 15 Players in a Rugby Team
8 T on a O - 8 Tentacles on an Octopus

I'd say u need to laugh at anything to get these

Ok try this...for it to work you have to say the answers OUT LOUD! If you are on a public computer just whisper them to yourself or something lol.


what is...

5+1=?
4+2=?
3+3=?
2+4=?
1+5=?


Now say "six" as many times as you can in 10 seconds.

now THINK of a vegetable (don't say it)

scroll down

#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#
#

Was your vegetable a carrot?




If not - you are one of the two percent of people that think of something else!

oh I have one of those! but I deleted it in an email!

WOW...why does everyone think of a carrot?? I dont see the connection.